I really am in an emotional bind this holiday season! Sometimes as all the holidays come and go i find myself a little challenged to be grateful.
I'd like to spend the holidays being with my family in appreciation of all have have and come out of it all with a big AH HA look at all the blessings you have and the things you have overcome!
Instead i generally, although ever grateful, come out a little bitter in some path life had taken me and also a bit conflicted on some i've taken myself.
This time of year always leaves me remembering my family far away. Every holiday that passes i marvel at how quickly my children are getting older and how sad i am that i can not share it with those closest to me.
This is the first year i spend without my grandpa, who meant the world to me, and so i think this year may be the hardest. Happiness is only as whole a those you share it with.
I have always been blessed in my ability to see through any storm and know that we will always be okay and protected but this year i find myself a bit more challenged than usual.
I wake up every morning to the faces of angels and i know that in so many ways, no matter my hardships, i should not be feeling so alone.
Yet like many i still do. Maybe i am not seeking out God in the way i should. Maybe i'm just overwhelmed by all that i have going on or maybe a just need to go home...
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
A description of me huh,... hard to keep it short with all of my amazing qualities!! :-)
I am FINALLY going back to school to finish my degree!! 3 more years and i will be a TEACHER! Yippee!!!
I am a full time momaholic, a friend with a shoulder and a drink, a daughter that hopes my chilren never put me through what i put my mom through and a ever learning child of god.
I wake up every morning knowing that no matter what the day throws at me i will end it blessed and happy surrounded by the three muskettets!
My oldest daughter Emma will be 8 in less than 6 months! OMG! The time has flown by and i am amazed by her every day. She is such a great big sister and daughter. She impresses me every moment (well most) with her kindness, humor and abilty to always point out the best in people. She has a ever growing mind and is always trying new things.
In the middle of our chaos we have Deanna who will be 6! in 6 months! She is the warmest most heartfelt child i have ever known. Always looking for a way to make others smile and laugh. She is really in tune with her feeling and wears them on her sleeve. Everyday she makes me remember why i am here and what my purpose is. Unlike her older sister she is more of an artist than an athlete. Everything she creates is a masterpiece and always very colorful. She has more of a stuborn streak than the rest which just brings out that vibrant personality!
Last and of couse not least we have Lola. The baby of our clan she definetly plays the part. Not one to EVER go un-noticed she has more spunk than any kid i have ever met. She is really standing up and becoming her own person. It is unbelievable to me that she is going to be 2 in 2 days! You'd never beleive it though since she is such a talker and so in to doing stuff her sisters are doing, keeping up with the jonses type of girl! She can get away with everything with just a smile and a giggle and i for one enjoy letting her do it!
Well thats us! Hope you enjoy reading my stories and thoughts. Don't forget to comment!